Leaving on a Jet Plane!

I didn’t leave on a jet plane, but all of my newfound friends did. They were all traveling many miles to their exciting homes. I, on the other hand, made my trek home by way of the I-75 to I-24 in good ole Altima. Please try to contain your excitment.

My New Friends

Side Note: I think Georgia has something rigged with the radio stations. When I was crossing Georgia’s state line on Sunday the first time, playing on the radio was “Georgia on My Mind.” Then when I crossed back into Tennessee for that 5 mile stretch and back into Georgia again, “Midnight Train to Georgia” was playing on the radio. So…when I was going back home...guess what was playing on the radio?? I even purposely put the radio on a country radio station to avoid the 60’s songs to test my theory. Then, I heard Reba’s voice and started to laugh. “That was night the lights went out in Georgia…” started playing through my speakers. When I got to the second state line… you guessed it “The Devil Went Down to Georgia.” Either this is a great conspiracy in the Public Relations department for the state of Georgia or I am that crazy!

Side Note to the Side Note: Randstad radio commercials played every time I saw a Murfreesboro City sign. I think it was sent out to be a subliminal message to show up to work on Monday. I will get back to you with my findings.

So I am really sad that everyone was leaving, but I was excited to get home and “Be still like vegetables. Lay like broccoli.” on the couch. (Quote from Pretty Woman) However, I stopped in Ringgold, GA to see my college roommate Mary Page Crutcher and her husband and the cutest baby girl, Emerson Grace. So…the Jenny story unravels as the following. First you should know to never, never under any circumstances trust Mapquest when you are trying to locate a place in the south, just word to the wise. So I’m traveling along pretending to like country because it is the only radio stations that I can pick up. I pull off the exit as stated on Mapquest to Mary’s house. Hmm… first glance at all the street signs are located to the far left and right and not on the stop lights where naturally they would be. No instead, someone placed them on little stop signs that are so hard to read in normal light and going only 5 MPH.

I, on the other hand, was traveling under the speed limit at 30 MPH and had the sun right in front of me for great glaring reaction. So… I was going along and finally just gave up and picked one with the rationale that if it isn’t the right one. I would turn around go the opposite direction and find the right one with the sun to my back. However it was my lucky day and I had picked the street I was looking for. Then I proceeded to travel 0.9 miles exactly to find the next street. It was right too! Feeling confident, I looked for my next turn. It said 0.4 miles to the next left. Nothing was on the left so I kept going and going. I ended up on the film set of Deliverance. There were pigs and goats everywhere. I had no idea where I was and where I was headed. Now for what really makes this a Jenny story. My gas tank light was on and starting to flash. I looked down at my phone and it had already cut off because it was dead. So picture this: I am out in middle of nowhere with no phone and about to be out of gas and really, really tired and needing to go to restroom (which always happens when I get nervous or feel that this story will end up on the 10 o’clock news.)

I turned around and found the nearest house. A man was out in his yard watering his grass. I pulled up in the driveway to ask for directions. He just waved and thought I was coming to visit as all true southerners do. Finally, I got him to come over and talk to me. He verified that I was way off course and I had missed the street by a long shot. He told me of a short cut to get me back on my path and wished me luck.

I got back on the main road and followed the man’s directions. I started to appear in a more suburb type of neighborhoods. Thank goodness! I noticed I was going up and down a lot of hills which seemed odd, but I was still in mountain country so okay. I pulled into the neighborhood entrance appropriately named Rolling Hills and found the street that I was looking for. I then went up and down like a rollercoaster for many miles. I was going up such steep hills that I was certain my car would die of exhaustion. My things were going everywhere inside the car. (If I had the Touareg already this drive would be fun.)

Anyway, I was going up the next big hill and out of the side of my left window I see a mini-van about to T-Bone me. I started to scream and pushed the brake down so hard. I had the right away and she was just flooring it through the stop sign that was at the top of mountain I was driving up. The sun was in my eyes so had I not have looked to my left, I would have been… hmm. Not going to go there, but I think I would not be writing this blog today. So she made sure I was alright and I started to laugh/cry. 

I regrouped and went down the next hill to a wonderful dead end street. Mind you Mapquest’s directions told me to turn right on Scenic Circle. There was no Scenic Circle to turn on. So I had to trek back up the mountain to the scene of the almost crash and see what street signs were near. I happened to see on my new left down the way another street sign. It was the one I was looking for. I finally found her house and that I was going to cry out of excitement.

I got to see my Mary and laugh like crazy over all the funny stories that we have shared over the years. When I got back into my car with new directions from her husband, I felt better about driving again. Oh but wait, I got lost again. I will spare you that fun story. I was so tired and was drifting off to sleep as I traveled down the long dusty highway to Tennessee. I got home around Midnight Central Time, which I was still on EST time schedule. I think I was last one to get home from the training class and many had to fly over 2000 miles to get home. I get home and find that Kris had moved all the furniture out of the living room into the kitchen with the exception of the sofa and the entertainment armoire. He was asleep on the couch and started to mumble at me. Oh it is great to be home, not! Just kidding, I miss all of my new friends and my time in the ATL. Just remember MapQuest translated means Request a Map!